Apologies to the edubloggers who have expressed concern over my cursory abandonment of the Artichoke blog. Whenever I resolved that its neglect had become habitful and that I had to kill the blog, some comment or email unnerved me, and I left it to continue alone in a rudderless way.
I will admit that I kept thinking Artichoke would only be ignored for a coupla’ days, or until I wrote that penguin travel letter to Lunaboca, or once I’d responded to urgent requests from X,Y and Z. But days, weeks, and now months have slid by without a curmudgeonly post and without any angst ridden blog feedback from my more measured friends, those friends who seek to protect me from myself.
“Whew Arti! This is very strong and again very sweeping. Even if it is true in some instances you are not going to persuade people you have alienated! And it goes without saying that they are unlikely to see their actions in quite the same light or they wouldn’t do it!
I have not been idle – quite the reverse, I feel like I have been lyin’ in a pond distributin’ swords for ever and ever and ever. I find myself totally knackered from persuading people – and ever yearning to be persuaded by some new thought myself.
I feel mute, bland, and almost anonymous in my thinking. Almost institutional again.
My blog writing time has disappeared, sucked up into something unexpectedly special;
- unplanned trips to Los Angeles and back before breakfast,
- a stay in a fishing village near Great Yarmouth,
- dancing at a nightclub in Belgium,
- drinking in a whorehouse in Iraq, and
- searching for a shotgun carrying intruder at 3am whilst my fear-filled companion - an 89year old clad in Y fronts and carpet slippers clutches the torch.
I have picked up shared responsibility for grandpa whose dementia means he increasingly forgets and misrepresents his life.
The funny thing is that although as you can learn a lot about the “L” word when you watch it growing - you can do a lot of new thinking in watching the “L” word disappear.
As memories increasingly flee Grandpa, more memories build in me.